Friday, April 22, 2005

No Day but Today

Well, after four years, 8 semesters, 16 Basic Science Courses, 6 3rd year clinical rotations, 9 4th year clinical rotations, COUNTLESS EXAMS (I KNOW I took 66 over the past four years...maybe a few I have forgotten about) Steps I & II, too many call nights to remember (thankfully some I have forgotten) and lastly, today, ACLS (advanced cardiac life support) I am FINISHED with medical school. The first Friday of medical school I ate at Chipotle with my friend Wes. Today, he and I finished the way we began, with lunch at Chipotle. It was poetic.

Medical School has shown me challenges that I never thought I would know at age 28. Struggling with school for the first time in my life. Dealing with the loss of my father-in-law, Beth's dad (he was 51). Trying to balance school, family, Beth (we found out I was accepted into school the day we got back from our honeymoon), hobbies, responsibilities all at once, at times, has left me confused and uncertain. Marriage is not for wimps. Beth and I have been tested and I'm sure that we will be tested in the future. But God knew the kind of woman that I needed and he brought me the most perfect wife. Not that she's perfect (Laura can vouch for me...Scott and Will too!) but she's perfect for me. And I love her. I am in love with her and that love grows deeper every day she puts up with me. She has put her dreams on hold to support me these last 4 years. I cherish her and am amazed that she sticks by this stubborn old mule. If you meet the Gallants and the Turners (Mom and Dad's mothers' family, respectively) you would know that I didn't stand a chance when it came to stubbornness. We are opinionated and we DON'T like to be wrong and we don't mind telling you. Ha! My mom's family reunions are a HOOT! 80+ year old women each telling their other 80+ year old sisters how they should do things. And each resenting the others for saying something. But back to Beth. One thing that will always stick with us...My Granddad Brown (Dad's dad) Thanksgiving 1999, just a few months before he passed away, when we were going around the table saying what we were thankful for, said this, "I'm thankful for my little bride, my little Nell." I may not tell her enough, or show her enough, my I am thankful every day that God brought Beth into my life. We have much left to accomplish...Together!

Many positives have also come out of the last 4 years. I have made friendships that will last a lifetime. I have renewed old acquaintances (who knew Rhonda (the girl next door in Abilene) would show up for an appointment with the doctor that I was working with fifteen YEARS after I had seen her last?!?). I have lived a dream. When I matched into Med/Peds, I realized a dream that I've had for a long time. The dream of being a doctor. Now, my dad will tell you that's been my dream since I was 5--he always wanted me to be here--and never let me settle for second--THANK YOU, DAD. Of course, there are many others who rightly deserve thanks as well. Mom--I remember those nights in Abilene when I waited until the ABSOLUTE LAST MINUTE to START a project. And we'd go up to your work and spend 4 or 5 hours copying, typing, cutting, pasting, and putting the finishing touches on whatever it was. I would read and you type. I would think and you would help me put it into words. For those of you who might not know...My mother is a saint on Earth. God has blessed me richly with 2 parents who've spent everything they had to make sure that their children had what they wanted...Even when we didn't need it. I love you both enormously!

Grandparents and best friends, childhood and college, in-laws and out-laws (you know who you are), ministers and mentors, music teachers and classmates...You have all shaped my life and helped me stand where I am today. I think of you all often and my door, phone, anything you need is open, 24/7 all you need to do is ask. I know that I've made some mistakes in my life. And for those, I am truly sorry. Hopefully none to justify losing a friend over. And hopefully ones that you have forgiven. I bring this up because my 10 year high school reunion is this summer, and I plan on attending...but I will have to blog about that another time. This one is already getting long, and I'm not finished!

The coming days are both terrifying and exciting all at once. There are still many questions to answer. We haven't sold our condo, yet, ergo, we haven't been able to move to our new house. Some of our "med school friends" are moving to different cities to begin their residencies and therefore leaving us without their company. We wish them all the best. There are new friends to be met and made once residency starts. All exciting and terrifying, all at once.

On May 28th, I will enter George R. Brown Convention Center a 28 year-old kid from Abilene, Texas. I will leave Jeremy L. Brown, MD. And June 24th, someone is going to page me and ask me to take care of their loved one. Me, Jeremy.

May the Lord Bless you and Keep you all.

Friday, April 08, 2005

A Whole New World

So I am taking some inspiration from my beautiful wife Beth and am going to try to blog. This should be interesting considering the world which I am soon entering. That of an Intern.

First let me say a few things about the world today. Michael Shiavo had the right to decide what happened to his wife. I know that his may draw some fire from those around me (aka Mom), but regardless of the money, the affair, or whether or not Terri Shiavo was in a persistent vegetative state, her husband legally had the right to make that decision. For the record, if any of you reading this ever find me in the same condition as Terri was, PLEASE pull my feeding tube! I PROMISE that I will forgive you and not hate you or curse you, even if I know that I'm being starved to death. Terri was in the same condition the day before she died as she was 15 years earlier when her heart stopped and her brain was deprived of oxygen for some amount of time (I don't know personally how long a time this was). Sure, give me 2 months to see what happens, see if there is some chance of improvement, but PLEASE do not feed me through a tube for 15 years. That is not the life that I want. I would rather sing with the angels, than be fed through a tube.

Secondly, I am marveled by the faith of the man known as John Paul II. I have been transfixed ever since the night they reported that he was gravely ill. I even stayed up until 2:00 a.m. watching the latest news. In reading his will on CNN, there is no question that he was a man of God and fought with all his might to stand up for the things that he believed in. In his will, he left nothing because he had nothing to leave. No car, no cell phone, no retirement fund. His instructions merely said burn my personal papers and bury me in the ground. The weight he carried leading 1 Billion Catholics is nearly impossible to fathom. The grace, passion, and faith in which he did it, is remakable.

Graduation is 7 weeks from tomorrow, then this blog truly will be the "Ramblings of a Med/Peds Intern".

Thanks for reading.